Isolation is one of the most consistent predictors of pastoral burnout. And bi-vocational pastors are among the most isolated people in ministry.

You do not have colleagues down the hall. You may be the only pastor in your denomination within 30 miles. The people at your day job do not understand your ministry life. The people in your congregation do not fully understand your work life. You live in two worlds and belong fully to neither.

This is not just emotionally difficult. It is dangerous. Research from Biola University’s Flourishing in Ministry initiative, based on more than 10 years of study with over 20,000 ministry leaders, identifies intentional community as one of the key factors that enables pastors to flourish long-term. Pastors who have genuine peer relationships are significantly less likely to burn out and significantly more likely to stay in ministry. (Source: flourishinginministry.org)

What You Actually Need

Not all relationships serve the same function. A healthy support network for a bi-vocational pastor includes at least four kinds of relationships:

A mentor, someone further along in ministry who can speak into your life and calling. Ideally someone who has navigated bi-vocational ministry themselves. This person can see things you cannot see because they have been where you are.

A peer, another pastor at a similar stage who understands your specific challenges. Not a competition. A companion. Someone you can be honest with about the hard parts of ministry without worrying about how it reflects on you professionally.

A friend, someone who knows you as a person, not just as a pastor. Someone who does not need anything from you pastorally. This relationship is often the first to be neglected and the most important to protect.

A counselor or coach, a professional who can help you process the weight of ministry. This is not weakness. It is wisdom. Many denominations offer free or subsidized counseling for pastors.

Where to Find Bi-Vocational Peers

Finding other bi-vocational pastors requires intentionality. They are not usually at the large pastor conferences. They are not usually in the denominational spotlight. But they are out there, and they are looking for the same thing you are.

Your denomination’s regional office often has bi-vocational pastor networks or can connect you with others in similar situations. Ask specifically, do not assume they will proactively reach out.

The Rural Think Tank at ruralthinktank.com is a community specifically for rural and small church pastors. The podcast and community connect people who are navigating the same terrain you are.

Start something local. If there is no bi-vocational pastor network in your area, consider starting one. A monthly breakfast for bi-vocational pastors in your county costs almost nothing and could be exactly what several of your neighbors need. You are probably not the only one who needs it.

How to Maintain These Relationships When You Have No Time

The most common reason bi-vocational pastors give for not having peer relationships is time. They are not wrong that time is scarce. But the solution is not to wait until you have more time, that time will not come. The solution is to make peer relationships a non-negotiable part of your rhythm, even if they are small.

A monthly phone call with a peer pastor. A quarterly breakfast with a mentor. An annual retreat with a small group of bi-vocational pastors. These are not luxuries. They are maintenance. The pastor who neglects them will eventually pay a much higher cost.

Related Resources

• Bi-Vocational Ministry Hub
• Spiritual Survival and Soul Care
• Free Bi-Vocational Pastor Toolkit
• The Rural Think Tank